Tuesday 6 September 2022

Their role is to sit in the pew and watch it taking place

An Anglican requiem mass (he [Julian Litten], unlike Cola, believes in life after death) will take place at All Saints, King's Lynn, at eleven o'clock on a Wednesday morning - 'Wednesdays are always good days for funerals. If anyone wants to come up from London, they can catch the 9.44 and will be in good time.'

From the balcony of the church, a trumpet, trombone, kettle drum and choir will play the Prelude to Charpentier's Te Deum - and the funeral will begin. It will be done properly, soberly, tastefully, which is to say in accordance with tradition. ... 'There will be no eulogies,' he sneered. 'Nobody standing up and talking about me. No ghastly child reading a poem and bursting into tears. No member of the laity reading any of the lessons. I think it's tish. Rubbish. It's got nothing to do with the English funeral. Their role is to sit in the pew and watch it taking place.  

P. Ross,  A tomb with a view (2020), 31

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