Quickly my literal faith in God unraveled. My faith in the Church as a community, however, continued. People from my grandparents' church helped us through the difficult time: they visited our house frequently to make sure we had enough food while my depressed mother spent most of her days in bed. Once she was back on her feet and began to work double shifts to support us, they often invited me to their homes for dinner, so that I wouldn't be alone for too long with sad thoughts in my head.
...
I wondered if marriage to ordinary people was what religion was like to me after my father's departure: a companionship they abided by, out of habit and loyalty, which, even after the absolute faith and passion had long gone, would continue to offer support and consolation. A constant that was satisfactory, if not thrilling. Not a bad thing at all to live by, I used to think.
M. Lee, 8 lives of a century-old trickster (2023), 162-3